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Writer's pictureSheila Whittaker

Self Care, and Caring for All

Time & solitude


We all seem to lead such busy lives these days, and many forget or don’t prioritise time for themselves. It’s often difficult when you have so many balls in the air, to make time for yourself for self care. But these days I try to actually schedule in time for me when I need it. I find it absolutely necessary – chronologically the body is now entering the “elderly” phase, and needing more opportunities for rest, however much my youthful mind tells me about things I would like to do if I had the energy!

For me, self care is all about time and solitude – giving oneself time to just be in a supportive nurturing environment with nothing much to do, or doing something you really love - something that relaxes you and gives you much needed “time off”. We can’t always be there for people – we can’t give of our best if we are tired out and “on duty” all the time. We all need to re-charge our batteries at some point, and for me the Christmas period is just that opportunity. It’s a time when the work thins out, and I can spend some welcome periods resting and doing things I enjoy, rather than the usual admin and Coursework.

It’s particularly important to take time for self care when we’ve had a difficult week or month, or an especially busy or traumatic time. Healing needs space and time to do its magic, bringing us back to a place of harmony and wholeness. A short time every day put aside for meditation, gonging, listening to music, exercising, or some other harmonising activity will also be beneficial to our ongoing state of being.

There are also those times when we need time to come to terms with things that have happened, both in our personal lives, and also in our country or the world. This last few days has been that sort of time here in the UK for those of us who are fully awake and aware. I feel the best way we can deal with the situation we find ourselves in is to look after ourselves and each other mindfully and lovingly, and band together in community with like-minded others so that we can also care for those in need in whatever way is appropriate.. Clearly we are going to have to be our own mentors, and for disadvantaged others too.

Coming to terms with our feelings on a personal level also needs time and space. When for instance, you’ve had an emotional or physical shock, your feelings are very hurt, or you’ve had some really bad news – these are times when we need to withdraw and honour how we feel. Emotional self care is crucial. We need space and quiet time for ourselves to be able to process these things and come to terms with them. Healing isn’t usually instant. It takes time and space to grieve, truly feel our feelings, and honour our own needs on every level – physical, mental, emotional and spiritual. When we take time out in this way we can re-group and get ourselves re-centred and re-charged once more before we go out into the chaotic fray of life to deal with it all again. This is especially true if you are very sensitive and aware.

This is why I’ll be taking a period off over Christmas and New Year, for some self care, and to give myself some time to reflect, both on the events of the year that’s passed, and also on the year to come. I wish you all a quiet and peaceful festive season, and see you on the other side in 2020!


14th Dec, 2019

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